This year, only 3.4% of applicants were accepted into Harvard University, one of the United States top universities. As for the remaining 96.6% who did not get in, at least some of those people had their hearts set on it and were crushed when they were either waitlisted or rejected. The story is the same with other competitive colleges. Even students with great SAT scores, grades, and extracurriculars are bound to face rejection at some point in their college application experience. Knowing this, figuring out how to handle rejection can be a helpful step in making the college experience as painless as possible. According to collegedata.com, not taking rejection personally is an important step to making it easier on yourself. They expanded saying “A vision of your future has vanished. It's natural to grieve a little, or to feel angry, disappointed, frustrated, depressed, or envious of friends who were admitted. Feel whatever feelings come up, and when you feel ready, turn your attention to regrouping and mapping out your path ahead.” The process of grieving makes sense, especially in dealing with a disappointment that maybe you have been thinking about for a while. However, if you spend too much time grieving it could be detrimental. If you dwell on the past too long, you will only make yourself miserable and not be able to change it anyway. This is true for most things in life. There are other things that are detrimental to a person who has recently been rejected from college. According to Psyche Magazine, “There are many unhelpful ways to engage with yourself after you’ve been rejected. You have likely noticed some thoughts and beliefs about what rejection means to you. But you probably also realize that the thoughts people have when they are feeling strong emotions are not always the most accurate or helpful ones.” For example, with college rejection, an unhelpful and inaccurate thought process is that if you don’t get accepted into a particular college your life and future will somehow be horribly affected. In reality, this is often far from the truth. You have to believe that no matter what happens, you will prevail and keep your head afloat. Another thing you might think is that something is wrong with you, and that is why you weren’t accepted. The most important thing to realize with these competitive colleges is that may not be the case, but maybe that the college was looking for something else. At any rate, your college acceptance doesn’t define who you are. College, if you choose to go, is just one of the many steps that could affect a person’s life. In times like this, it’s helpful to look at the bigger picture.
Daniel Ovadia is an Aleph from Cherry Hill, NJ and I am the co opinion editor of my high school newspaper.
All views expressed on content written for The Shofar represent the opinions and thoughts of the individual authors. The author biography represents the author at the time in which they were in BBYO.