How-To Guide for Maintaining Long Distance Friendships

November 3, 2023
Rachel Hasko

Wayzata, Minnesota, United States

Class of 2025

Read more from this author →

I met one of my best friends, Taylor A., years ago at camp. She’s been in my tzrif (cabin) since third grade. We’ve spent every summer together, growing closer than ever before. Especially this summer, when we embarked on BBYO Passport’s Ultimate Central Europe Israel trip, we spent five weeks having the summer of our lives, meeting new friends, trying cultural foods, and creating memories we’ll never forget. The worst part of my summers, though, is when it’s time for her to go back to Milwaukee and myself to Minneapolis. Having long-distance friendships can suck, but there are a few things that I like to do to make it a little easier. Here’s my how-to guide to maintaining long-distance friendships:

  1. Find Common Similarities

When you can’t see your friends often, it’s incredibly important to find reasons to chat with each other. For Taylor and I talk about everything from Joshua Bassett to The Summer I Turned Pretty to Barcelona’s National Soccer Team. For my BBYO Passport friends, I send weekly icebreakers for them all to answer.  But really, you can find anything to keep in touch with your long-distance friends. Whether it’s giving each other a Fantasy Football recap, sharing funny TikToks, or giving each other life updates, you both have to put in the effort to keep in touch with one another while you can’t see each other in person.

  1. Set Parameters about How You’ll Stay in Touch

Speaking to your friends on the phone is a great way to maintain a relationship with them. I like to call Taylor when she is driving home from theater rehearsals to give her a run-down of the day, tell her about the drama she has missed, and hear her life updates. Finding set times to reconnect with your friends is essential for creating lasting friendships.

  1. Find Times to See Each Other

Finding time to see your long-distance besties can be a serious challenge. Coordinating schedules, deciding on travel plans, and actually following through can take a lot of effort. That being said, it’s completely worth it to get to see your friends after so long. Taylor comes to Minneapolis a couple of times each year. Not being able to see her all the time makes it far more special when I do get to see her. It has taught me not to take our friendship for granted. I know we will be reunited again with our other Passport friends in February at International Convention in Orlando. This makes me miss her less and instead makes me more excited to see her soon. If you are struggling to stay connected with your long-distance friends, sometimes all you need is to actually see them. 

Maintaining your friendships can be hard when you don’t have the ability to see them all the time. That being said, some of my best friends live far away from me, yet I wouldn’t change my friendship with them over anything.

PS: Taylor, I miss you so much, come and visit me!

Rachel Hasko is a BBG from Minnesota, and her favorite color is pink!

All views expressed on content written for The Shofar represent the opinions and thoughts of the individual authors. The author biography represents the author at the time in which they were in BBYO.

Explore More Stories

Spotlight

2023 Must Reads!

Ella Young
Michigan, United States

In need of a good book? Or want to start reading and want to know where to start? This list is for you!Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid: This book is amazing! It centers around a popular Hollywood actress, Evelyn Hugo, and all about her life story. It is very fun to read, and has a HUGE plot twist! Daisy Jones and the Six by Taylor Jenkins Reid: Interested in music? You should read Daisy Jones and the Six! In this story, you learn about a band that becomes very popular, and all the ups and downs they face. It is a super entertaining read and is being turned into a TV show in March 2023! It Ends With Us by Colleen Hoover: This story follows Lily Bloom, a girl who recently moved to Boston, and ready to start her new life. Through the book, you see how Lily evolves, and deals with a very impactful account. This book is so good, you won’t be able to put it down! All We Ever Wanted by Emily Giffin: Emily Giffin tells a very impactful story about an event that happens, and three different perspectives about it. The book highlights difficult topics, and shows how multiple people can change a story. The ending is very emotional, and definitely a book to add to your read list! Paper Towns by John Green: A story of adventure, romance, and mystery, Paper Towns is a book that keeps readers on their toes! It shows the dynamic between Margo, the most popular girl at school, and Quentin, a socially awkward boy who lives across the street from Margo. After one crazy night together, Margo disappears and leaves clues for Quentin to find her. This story will keep you on the edge of your seat! Malibu Rising by Taylor Jenkins Reid: It is August of 1983, and super Nina Riva is getting ready to throw her annual end of summer party. This book shows how in 24 hours, a LOT can happen. Malibu Rising is a super fun read, and shows how the different Riva kids can change in one day. Today Tonight Tomorrow by Rachel Lynn Solomon: Like to read books about academic rivals? This story is for you! Rowan and Neil have been rivals, but after they are forced to team up, things change for them. This is a super cute book with a sweet ending!

Get The Shofar blasted to your inbox

Subscribe
Subscribe